The other day I watched as the 2020 Special Olympics logo was unveiled, and couldn’t help but think… that’s the Firefox logo, stretched a bit with Special Olympics slapped over the middle. Sure, there’s a little green added in, but damned if the rest doesn’t just look like a slightly modded version of pure plagiarism.

Mexico Would Pay

Everyone seems to be stuck on the fact that the President said, repeatedly, that Mexico would pay for our border wall.

Granted, he simply said, “they’ll pay,” and never qualified or explained it further.  That makes it seem like he was expecting a check.  I don’t think he’s stupid, but I do believe that he tends to talk about end state when he should be explaining the details.

Here’s the reality:  Illegal immigration costs the United States billions every year in enforcement, care, and yes, benefits paid.  Illegal immigrants, primarily from Mexico, send billions of dollars across the border every year, propping up Mexico’s economy.  Billions of dollars’ worth of drugs flow North, and billions of dollars in cash flow South across the border every year.

A Southern border that is properly enforced would affect all of these, with the overall effect of reducing the amount of money removed from the US and sent to Mexico.

The US keeps more of its money.  Mexico receives less of it.

Mexico pays.

Why does no one articulate this?

Annual season of disrespect

It’s that time of year again. Retailers just can’t resist slapping the US flag on all sorts of things with the pretense of patriotism. Sadly, the public eats it up (or eats off of it), and tosses it in the trash… Never knowing, or even caring, the extent of their disrespect.

Don’t know what I’m talking about? Educate yourself:


Military Discount: Lowe’s vs. Home Depot

I always choose Lowe’s over Home Depot. The people are generally more useful at Lowe’s, but the main difference between the two stores – their product offerings are nearly identical – is their policies on military discounts. Lowe’s provides a no-nonsense, 10% off your entire purchase upon presentation of a military ID. Doesn’t matter if you’re buying something already on sale, marked down damaged, or display item… they take 10% off the total. Awesome. Home Depot, when they actually offer a military discount, is very particular about it. They’ll only give it on items that are otherwise full price. Now that might make sense from a business perspective, but when your main competitor is doing it better, you really ought to pay attention.

This weekend we were shopping for a new oven/range. The one that came with the house has crapped out again (this time it’s the oven thermostat), and I’m tired of taking it apart and replacing things. So I renewed my subscription to consumer reports and started reading reviews to see what looked good, and relatively affordable. We settled on the LG LRE4213ST (the knobs on the front were the deciding factor over the similarly equipped but not quite as nice LG LRE3083ST, which has an all-touchscreen panel on the back of the stovetop. Both were rated well and recommended by Consumer Reports. Sadly, no American made ovens in my price/feature range rated nearly as well, or I wouldn’t have even considered our Korean friends.

Looking at the 3083 at Home Depot, I was discussing the differences between the two and asked about ordering it from the store in order to get the military discount. Since the oven is listed as a “special buy” price (along with 75% of their inventory), I was told I could not “double dip” discounts and would have to pay the price as listed. I thanked the lady and left. From there I visited Sam’s Club, because they were the only store around with a 4213 on display and I wanted to see how much difference there really was. Sadly, Sam’s has no military discount, and the list price on both ovens was a lot less then that 10% discount, so I moved on to Lowe’s. By now my mind was pretty much made up to buy the more expensive 4213, and Lowe’s was more than happy to order the oven for me, set up the delivery, make sure I had the right power cord, AND give a 10% military discount.

It’ll take a few weeks to get it here (it’s apparently a big seller). Home Depot said they could get it to me in less time, but given their pricing policy, it’s no wonder everyone else is sold out while they have stock on hand. The stove top on the old oven still works, and I’ve been doing nearly all the ‘oven’ cooking in the Nuwave, so the wait is no problem.

Home Depot, if you’re paying attention, take a hint. Lowe’s policy is awesome, and it makes me a loyal customer. Yours makes me avoid you.

Amazon Reviews – don’t say anything bad about Amazon!

This one was refused:

The only litter my cats will all use. Had one with litter-box issues awhile back, and Dr. Elsey’s additive resolved that issue almost immediately. Have only bought this ever since. The only bad thing is Amazon makes my mailman deliver to my house now… and these bags are a bit heavy. Still cheaper than the pet store!

So I quickly cut, pasted, and edited it to this:

The only litter my cats will all use. Had one with litter-box issues awhile back, and Dr. Elsey’s additive resolved that issue almost immediately. Have only bought this ever since. The only bad thing they make my mailman deliver to my house now… and these bags are a bit heavy. Still cheaper than the pet store!

And it was accepted… guess it’s not acceptable to say Amazon is torturing my mailman. At least not directly!

New Day USA

I’ve posted before, without specificity, on my feelings in regards to admiral shithead and his scummy company, “New Day Fuck You USA”.  Well, fuck you, Tom Lynch.  Your company sucks.  You prey on veterans by offering them exactly what they are already entitled to, and soak them for the privilege.  Fuck you.  Veterans with shitty credit might fall into your trap, but fuck you for screwing over these people desperately in need.  I can’t wait to take part in the class action suit that makes you a pariah and a pauper.  You sick mother fucker, please die.  Have a nice day.

Altruistic, or Vulture?

Some as asshole calling himself, “Admiral”, keeps appearing on my television trying to sell mortgages to veterans.  But he offers nothing that the VA doesn’t already guarantee.  In fact, he’s trying to capitalize on our benefits, charging a fee for the privilege of using our benefits. This is the worst kind of scummy behaviour; preying on those he pretends to relate to. I usually change the channel when this POS appears, but tonight I felt the need to share. Carry on.


Another story today about a condo association telling the mother of a Marine and a Soldier to take down her American Flag.  Can I get a committee together to start slapping these idiot HOA board members until they learn not to be so damned stupid?


To the Southdale Gardens Condominium Association:  Believe it or not, your job isn’t to make your HOA look stupid…  this is federal law, folks… it doesn’t matter what the homeowner agreed to when they moved in, they can’t be held liable by a rule that is illegal in its nature.  You’ll lose, the membership will lose money paying for your lawyers, and if there’s any justice in the world, the membership will hold YOU financially liable for the costs.  Yeah, I know… your D&O insurance will cover your stupidity, but maybe you’ll at least feel some pain in the backlash.  One can only hope.

Here’s your reference, in case you can’t find it:

An act to ensure that the right of an individual to display the flag of the United States on residential property not be abridged.


A condominium association, cooperative association, or residential 
real estate management association may not adopt or enforce any policy, 
or enter into any agreement, that would restrict or prevent a member of 
the association from displaying the flag of the United States on 
residential property within the association with respect to which such 
member has a separate ownership interest or a right to exclusive 
possession or use.

Gun Free Zones

Amongst the tragedy of today’s murder of four young Marines, I cannot help but be stricken with the image of the front door of the recruiting center… and the obvious “no guns” sign plastered on the window.  Signs like this have appeared in the last year on facilities all over the base where I work.  This is particularly galling, since the base is a federal installation that BJ Clinton ensured years ago to be “gun free.”  That’s right, a military installation, where thousands of men and women are trained daily to handle firearms (and other weapons of war) and use them responsibly, prohibits the carry of firearms by any but those engaged in law enforcement (or, obviously, conducting training).  For the record, 99% of those carrying weapons for training have no access to ammunition… making their 21st century firearms good for nothing unless used as clubs.  And our military police force consists mostly of hired civilians.

I cannot adequately describe my disgust with this.

Change the damned law.


Why so hard to send a message…?

A recent renewal of my character in a game I used to play has brought some newcomers to this page.  And each of them, when trying to contact me, has asked… why the weird questions on the feedback page?  Well, let me share…

There’s a fellow, who happens to share my name, who has made quite a name for himself producing “shows” for idiots on a cable channel formerly known for presenting music videos.  I congratulate my namesake on his success, while at the same time cursing him for perpetuating such utter stupidity.  As it turns out, the people attracted to the silliness he perpetuates are not capable of discerning “him” from normal people who happen to share his name.  Did I mention he peddles his wares at the expense of the lowest common denominator?  Yes, they’re all idiots, losers, and morons.  (I am being overly kind here, I know)  For that reason, I have placed blocks in the path of anyone using this page to try to contact said namesake… but alas, my efforts have not dissuaded the most persistent among them.

I apologize to those who have valid reasons for reaching out to me, and promise that once I’ve recognized you, I’ll share an address by which you can reach me without such hassle.

To those foolish children who think I am the aforementioned individual, I will continue to harass, berate, and belittle you, hopefully until you cry, but at least until I am satisfied some semblance of wisdom has been imparted.  Seriously, if you can’t take a hint when it pokes you in the eye, you have no business expecting a polite response.

And yes, I fully remember that in-duh-vidual who actually thought to threaten me with physical harm because I hurt his stupid little feelings (miss ya, Ronny!).  I still know where you live, and what you look like.  I am fully capable of defending myself against the likes of you.  Stay in Florida, for your own good.  And good luck with that acting career(!)… such that it is.

– Jonathan

And who knows… maybe I’ll find a reason to start updating this page more than once a year!  If nothing else, to make the idiots famous.

Humidor Humidifiers

This should be a simple question, but it has me (and google, apparently) stumped.

If I stick a typical humidifier to the lid or back of my smallish humidor, how do I refill it?  I can’t pour water into it without turning the whole works upside down.  That means I have to take the cigars out, turn the box over, pour in the distilled water, take the whole thing to the sink and drain off the water that didn’t soak in, then bring it back and refill it.  This is dumb.

Currently, I am simply not attaching the humidifier – simply standing it on edge at the back of the box, and taking it out to refill as required.

There must be a better way – they all come with adhesives, right?


The really good ones all use YAHOO

No one uses this page to contact me for anything that really concerns me (the people who need to contact me know my real address). Occasionally spammers try to get around the CAPTCHA, and so, so many losers think I’m “that guy“… but I’ve been noticing a trend. Most of the losers dreaming of a career in television use YAHOO. So is the solution to cut off the ability of anyone with a YAHOO address to use the contact form? I may be on to something… thanks, Andrena – you may not have completely wasted my time.

Please, please, please… if you’re here because you think I can get you on some idiotic television show, GO AWAY.  I’m not him.  This site isn’t owned by him.  He’s only allowed to use my name because he had it before me.  Stop spamming me with your nonsense!  I don’t care about your hard life, your illegitimate children, your drug abusing parents, or your lack of basic English.  (I do occasionally get one that’s well written, polite, and pleasant to read… and I respond in kind – they’re rare).

Have a nice day!

Churchill’s Wisdom

How dreadful are the curses which Mohammedanism lays on its votaries! Besides the fanatical frenzy, which is as dangerous in a man as hydrophobia in a dog, there is this fearful fatalistic apathy. The effects are apparent in many countries. Improvident habits, slovenly systems of agriculture, sluggish methods of commerce, and insecurity of property exist wherever the followers of the Prophet rule or live. A degraded sensualism deprives this life of its grace and refinement; the next of its dignity and sanctity. The fact that in Mohammedan law every woman must belong to some man as his absolute property—either as a child, a wife, or a concubine—must delay the final extinction of slavery until the faith of Islam has ceased to be a great power among men. Individual Moslems may show splendid qualities. Thousands become the brave and loyal soldiers of the Queen: all know how to die. But the influence of the religion paralyzes the social development of those who follow it. No stronger retrograde force exists in the world. Far from being moribund, Mohammedanism is a militant and proselytizing faith. It has already spread throughout Central Africa, raising fearless warriors at every step; and were it not that Christianity is sheltered in the strong arms of science—the science against which it had vainly struggled—the civilization of modern Europe might fall, as fell the civilization of ancient Rome.

And then England was invaded.