With all the science at our disposal, why does the creation of an artificial sweetener that doesn’t taste like bile still elude mankind? The mad doctors at Johnson and Johnson cooked up Splenda (aka. sucralose) as a no-calorie sugar alternative. In fact, Splenda is basically a sugar molecule with a few Hydrogen and Oxygen atoms shaved off, and a few Chlorine atoms added in. This is supposed to provide the net effect of more sweetness per molecule, in a combination that the body does not recognize as food. Oh, and it’s supposed to taste the same as sugar.

Newsflash: It doesn’t taste like sugar.

Forget all the shaky science of food modification. Forget the perverse idea of food additives that the body doesn’t consider food (shall we now eat plastic?) Forget the idea of adding even more poisonous chlorine to our diets. This crap has a bitter aftertaste that is strongly reminiscent of the last (first?) big thing in sugar replacement… Saccharin.

Maybe it’s just me, I honestly don’t know. People eat this shit every day, and don’t complain about it. I make the mistake of eating something sweetened by this artificially modified crap and suffer with the acidic aftertaste for hours. The only comparison I can make is the taste of bile that permeates the back of the mouth when I almost vomit.

I made the mistake of buying some ice cream that was on sale the other day… 2 for 1 = free ice cream, right?! Ok, so I wasn’t really paying attention – it was sweetened with Splenda. I had never tried Splenda before; since I had such foul memories of Saccharin, I had no desire to try the “new version”. Well, when I got home and realized my oversight, I decided to give it a try anyway. Needless to say, that’s two cartons of polluted ice cream that no one will ever have to consume – they hit the trash in no time flat.

Tonight I did a little brief research to find out just what Splenda is – there’s a rather amusing website here, which contains a lot of pseudo-science explaining why Splenda is evil. Reading “The Truth about Splenda” and the official “Splenda” website side by side is a fun experiment in he-said, she-said. Nothing of value to be gained there.

Bottom line: While Splenda may or may not be good or bad for you, it definitely does not taste like sugar, and leaves a sickening aftertaste that is impossible to ignore.